Since two weeks we have a friend on board. It is a tight space and that means you can’t hide for longer than some days. If even. Meeting that woman randomly and letting her stay with us for weeks showed me some parts of myself. But how?
She has the same name as I have. As my name is rather seldom especially my age, this is special. Like this, I feel like I have a strange connection to her. A little while ago, I stumbled over a Pinterest pin that said: “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear”. That somehow caught me and stayed with me.
She is a few years older than I am and I feel like she is showing me a mirror of my own flaws just exaggerated. I know it sounds weird and I ask myself if that happened to anyone else?
Being a little know it all, reacting far over the top when being stressed, up to being rude without knowing it and endless discussions over unnecessary things accumulate with taking personal offence in normal conversations that have nothing to do with her. All points of my behaviour more or less long ago. That behaviour annoys me at one hand and at the other I totally understand it.
But it also shows me, how I have developed personally. Sometimes, I still behave the same way, but I try to watch myself closely and when I recognise these things in myself, I try to behave differently. I have grown. She hasn’t. So, if I would have not tried to grow over myself, I might have ended up like her. Pretty alone, only seeming to be independent. Can that teach me something?
I don’t know if I am already better than I was yesterday, but I try my best every day. So, having her around shows me, that my attempts to overcome my flaws already worked. I know, I still am far from being perfect, but now I can hoist my colours, saying that I came already a quite far way.
Life is never only a happy thing. It goes up and down all the time. But the down parts are important to honor the ups and appreciate what we have. Does life ever get better? Yes, it does. But you have to do something about it. Only sitting in your chamber waiting for that one miracle to happen, will never lead to anything but bitterness. Stand up. Be a pirate at heart. Follow your own wishes and hopes, knowing what you stand for and what you want from life. If you never ask, the answer will always be no. You are stronger than you think you are. Allow life to teach you and show you the wonderful little things.
I want you to take a look around at other people and your own past. Where have you grown? Where can you hoist your colours and be proud of who you became?